The Black Iron Bedpost

ecase: Grace.

Wed, 15 May 2013 08:00:26 -0700

ecase:

Grace.

Oh yeah… #goldenhour makes me want to lay down on the...

Tue, 14 May 2013 23:00:43 -0700

Oh yeah… #goldenhour makes me want to lay down on the asphalt and consume a popsicle.

"Sleep is forgiveness. The night absolves. Darkness wipes the slate clean, not spotless,but clean..."

Tue, 14 May 2013 16:00:08 -0700

““Sleep is forgiveness. The night absolves. Darkness wipes the slate clean, not spotless,but clean enough for another day””

- Buechner (via pursuingpeace)

"Have daylight mercy on my midnight soul."

Tue, 14 May 2013 08:00:18 -0700

“Have daylight mercy on my midnight soul.”

- From Frederick Buechner’s Godric (via wewontneedlegs)

"You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles in between you, but at the same time you..."

Mon, 13 May 2013 19:30:48 -0700

““You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles in between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.””

- Frederick Buechner (via soundthewindchimes)

"Your criticism sounds to me as if you have read too many critical books and are too smart in an..."

Sat, 11 May 2013 08:00:18 -0700

““Your criticism sounds to me as if you have read too many critical books and are too smart in an artificial, destructive, and very limited way.””

- Flannery O’Connor

Heaven got a good one today. My heart may be heavy, but I...

Fri, 10 May 2013 18:17:35 -0700

Heaven got a good one today. My heart may be heavy, but I rejoice knowing that to be absent from this life, is to be present with the Lord. No more suffering. I love you grandma and I can’t wait to dance with you in heaven. #odeathwhereisyoursting?

I arrive home from class tonight… After sitting through 5 hours, and two classes. I walk...

Thu, 09 May 2013 20:54:55 -0700

I arrive home from class tonight…

After sitting through 5 hours, and two classes.

I walk with one professor to her office hours to be pulled aside from another professor…

“I just wanted to let you know, your submission was incomplete, and will be graded as such.”

I walk the rest of the way to office hours where the creation of an anxiety attack is brewing.

As I await outside their door, I jot down what I have left to do to “survive” this semester.

-1500 word take home final on Yoga
- 5 page paper on foreign film, Followed by viewing 10 foreign films
- Final and a two page paper
- “Fix” my lousy submission and write exit paper for major, and create a half hour presentation
- 10 page thesis

“You’re gonna submit your paper to the Comparative Religion Student Journal, right?”

Yes, let me get right on that, as I have two weeks to create something scholarly.

I drive home, slightly freaking out.
I can feel the anxiety inside my chest.
So much worry.
So much unrest.
So much fear.

I make it home, to a quiet house and pull out my phone as my mother asks if I am okay.

Okay?

OKAY!?!

No.

I am not okay.

I am exhausted, mentally, physically, spiritually, etc.

I want to do well.

I hate failing for I feel like I am failing myself.

I know I am capable of more…

And that lies my problem.

So, I nod my head, yet again and stumble out a reply of yes.

But really, all I want to do is cry.
All I want to do is run (literally, a nice jog)
All I want to do is scream aloud.
All I want is Jesus.

I am not okay.

Photo

Thu, 09 May 2013 20:44:07 -0700

nickbogardus: A much needed reminder.

Wed, 08 May 2013 13:11:40 -0700

nickbogardus:

A much needed reminder.

RIGHT BEFORE MY DAD TOLD ME HE IS CONCERNED THAT I EAT SO MUCH MEAT

Sat, 04 May 2013 12:31:06 -0700

whatshouldwecallpaleolife:

Submitted by [yourtoastisburnt]

@jennyrey @g_vanginkel

Today has been the hardest I have fought cravings on Paleo…Literally anything that wafted by...

Fri, 03 May 2013 16:55:45 -0700

Today has been the hardest I have fought cravings on Paleo…

Literally anything that wafted by my nose instantly became something that had to be in my tummy.

Perhaps it is the heat, but all I am craving is chocolate and carbs and ice cream.

That reminds me, I want to go to Mother’s to get a Chocolate Almond milk and see if I can turn it into a popsicle…

I succumb this morning, to about 4oz of leftover hot chocolate this morning with a dollop of whip cream… I will say though, it was much needed as I was about to crash, and my body was absolutely hating me due to the winds and weather outside. It soothed my throat as it went down, and the fears of an upset stomach were never met- just the guilty conscious that I consumed something that I shouldn’t have.

I spent the rest of the morning chomping on 5 mini packets of nuts and drinking water. I’m know at home and all I want is bread… and sugar…

Anything really…

It is so hot and miserable about, I don’t have any energy to do make myself some dinner… but I know I need to… and to go grocery shopping so that I can avoid all these cravings!

"We’re going to be okay, aren’t we Papa? Yes. We are. And nothing bad is going to happen to..."

Mon, 29 Apr 2013 19:57:14 -0700

“

We’re going to be okay, aren’t we Papa?

Yes. We are.

And nothing bad is going to happen to us.

That’s right.

Because we’re carrying the fire.

Yes. Because we’re carrying the fire.

”

- Cormac McCarthy, “The Road” p. 83

Photo

Sun, 28 Apr 2013 18:48:02 -0700

"So often we try to make other people feel better by minimizing their pain, by telling them that it..."

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 21:17:45 -0700

“So often we try to make other people feel better by minimizing their pain, by telling them that it will get better (which it will) or that there are worse things in the world (which there are). But that’s not what I actually needed. What I actually needed was for someone to tell me that it hurt because it mattered.
I have found this very useful to think about over the years, and I find that it is a lot easier and more bearable to be sad when you aren’t constantly berating yourself for being sad.”

- John Green (via loveyourchaos)

Well, after many hopeful phrases on my part about visiting my sister, my sister finally had enough...

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 21:03:31 -0700

Well, after many hopeful phrases on my part about visiting my sister, my sister finally had enough and purchased me a ticket to come visit her in Boston.

Insert insane squeal!

I was bobbing up and down at work over her generosity towards me this morning.

My tax return could have covered a ticket, but, I was planning on waiting until Thanksgiving to visit so that I could pay off a little more of my debt.

(Yes, I am a college student and I have loans to pay off!)

Over a few text messages, during one of the busiest school weeks of my life, my sister added to the chaos a glimpse of joy— that after all my sleepless nights and stressful mornings cease, and after the last Senior thesis is submitted, I have a reward.

I have BOSTON.

(And, I have nine days to spend with my sister, who, when I visit, I haven’t seen in 9 months. Sometimes, when life is overwhelming, all you need is a hug from your sister… and I can’t wait to hug mine.)

I can’t wait to walk the Common, ride the T to Davis Square, explore the shelves of the Booksmith in Brookline and see if I can add to my collection… Sip a latte from True Grounds, people watch inside of Peet’s at Coolidge Corner… visit Reality Boston… open myself up for the Lord to speak in my life and in my heart…

Yup… I can’t wait!

My evening consisted of playing around in the CS Lewis section...

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 23:05:01 -0700

My evening consisted of playing around in the CS Lewis section of Pollack Library… After 5.5 hours of writing about his Eschatology this morning… And 3 hours of class…

Now it’s onto a midterm, and then a day of Yoga Sutras tomorrow… And Friday… FREEEEEEDOM!

"I don’t know where I’ll go, but I hear that train coming. So I step outside and close my..."

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 12:30:43 -0700

“I don’t know where I’ll go, but I hear that train coming. So I step outside and close my eyes and hope I feel something on the world’s last night…”

- Heath McNease, “The World’s Last Night”

“If they don’t love Jesus more than they love you, they’re not gonna love you...

Sun, 21 Apr 2013 21:31:06 -0700

“If they don’t love Jesus more than they love you, they’re not gonna love you well.” -Tim Keller, “Love and Lust”

The Good Women Project: 10 Lies Christians Believe About Interacting With The Opposite Sex

Sun, 21 Apr 2013 09:04:00 -0700

The Good Women Project: 10 Lies Christians Believe About Interacting With The Opposite Sex:

Actually, an interesting read that I can mostly identify with… Mostly.